The Part About Motherhood That No One Will Tell You

Motherhood.

There is a part that no one will tell you. At least, no one told me.

Or if they did, perhaps I just wasn’t ready to listen.

It is going to break you wide open. It is going to crack you right in two.

One day you will see your child kiss their stuffed animal goodnight, just as the fading sun is shining in through their window, wrapping them in the warmest glow, and you will wonder what you ever did to deserve this.

How could you possibly deserve this perfect love?

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You do.

You must believe that you do. 

Sometimes the love is going to rain down hard. It’s going to crash in like a thunderstorm when you least expect it. The lightning will come at you with jagged edges, flashing uncertainty, doubt, and worry as you are resting in the darkness of the night.

It’s going to beat down and swell up like a swirling flood within your soul, leaving you to decide, “Will I rise or will I crumble?”

You must not crumble. 

Even if all you knew before when it got too heavy was the crumbling. Even though the love might feel like falling, this time trust that you will rise.

Some days when you feel yourself being pulled apart, you will find your eyes searching the room for the grown up storming in to save you.

Their eyes will be searching, too.

Then amidst your overwhelm, your guilt, your exasperation, you will realize their eyes have landed on you.

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There is no one else to calm the storm. And though you’ve never been the best at moving shaky legs to higher ground, this time it’s all on you.

You must believe you can see this through.

You see, the part that no one ever tells you is that none of us are whole.

Even mothers meant to guide the lives of others come into it with cracks and bruises. Scraped up spirits. Messy heartbreaks. 

None of us are whole.

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Yet, here we are.

Beautifully broken and somehow bringing forth perfectly formed new beginnings. 

Here we are, the ones elected to carry the load and make it all better. To kiss the ouchies and scare the monsters away. To show up, relentlessly, day after day after day, in spite of our own little scuffs that could use a band aid, in spite of the monsters in our minds trying to frighten us into to quitting.

But this time you won’t back down, because you are stronger than you ever knew.

That is the secret of mothering.

It’s the best part that no one can ever tell you; something to be discovered on your own:

The very love that can seem to overtake you will be the binding that keeps the hardest days from breaking you. 

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Though we might not be whole — we might be a bit trampled over — we are enough just as we are.

Motherhood will break you, yes.

The bursting love might split your heart in two.

But the most blessedly beautiful are the broken things –broken wide open and rising to be built anew.

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My little and mighty children teach me everyday to be the best version of myself. To embrace my perfectly unique imperfections, and to rise to the challenge as I’ve never ascended before.

Aren’t these tees from Little & Mighty just perfect for the little ones in our life who inspire us to tap into our curiosity, thoughtfulness, bravery?

I’m so grateful for the time I spent as a contributor to Little & Mighty’s Mighty Mamas series. Be sure to follow their blog and tune in each Monday for honest discussions on all the secrets of motherhood from the mightiest of mamas – just like you!

 

 

 

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26 thoughts on “The Part About Motherhood That No One Will Tell You

  1. I think the combination of your beautiful writing and restless sleep made me cry while reading this. Choosing to rise over crumbling as best as I can. Thank you for constantly reminding me that I am enough at this motherhood thing and that I’m not the only one to feel this way.

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    1. Sweet friend, I wrote this post for others, yes, but the truth is that I mostly wrote it for myself, because recently I have felt myself crumbling. I have been afraid that I am incapable of rising above it. But we have to believe that we are strong, capable, and worthy. You aren’t alone. xo

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  2. BAH you did it AGAIN!!!!! I can’t even blame the PMS, fatigue or glass of wine because I know darn well it’s just that you capture things so freaking perfectly that has me tearing up (AGAIN). Thank you, thank you again for capturing all the things I can’t and doing it in such an flawless way.

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    1. OH, girl, the PMS fatigue struggle is no joke. Thank you so much for always finding a moment to come and support my words – which I tend to release rather vulnerably, wondering if anyone else will relate. I hope you are having a lovely and less fatigued day! xo

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  3. So powerful because as usual you cut right to the heart of our insecurities, reveal them for what they are and let the light in. Shine on, friend.

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  4. So wonderful when we realize that our brokenness is what makes us beautiful. Then we can show our kids that real love seeps through the cracks and is only enhanced by the breaking. Loved this!!!

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